No Man's Fort, Overnight Stay
At the end of July, we jumped on a boat and sailed across the Solent to No Man's Fort, part of the Solent Forts group. Visiting No Man's has been on our list of things to do for quite a while so we were really excited to finally see what all the fuss was about.
We parked at Gunwharf Quays as the boat leaves from the shopping outlet and made our way to the check in desk. After dropping off our bags, we had a little bit of time to do some shopping and grab a quick bite to eat before setting sail. Normally, the boat goes via Spitbank Fort but on this occasion it was being used for a private event so we wizzed past and headed to our fort. The journey took around 30 minutes and was really enjoyable given the calm waters and beautiful blue skies.
When you board the fort, you are welcomed with a glass of prosecco and then the guests are split into two parties, the day guests and overnight guests. From here you are taken on a tour of the fort and are told about its interesting history. This was actually really interesting and enjoyable. After the tour, the day guests headed off for their afternoon tea and the evening guests are able to check into their rooms and experience what the fort had to offer.
The roof of the fort has been 'decorated' to look like a huge garden complete with benches and picnic tables. I had mixed feelings about the way it had been put together if I'm honest. The artificial grass was quite cute but there was also an odd array of tacky sculptures scattered around and the flower beds could have done with a bit of a tidy up. But all in all, it was nice to grab a G&T and enjoy the sunshine.
We were lucky enough to visit when the we were experiencing a real summer in the UK (which lets face it, doesn't happen often!) so it made sense to spend as much outside as possible. One of the great things about the fort is that it has two hot tubs locate on the roof. Given the glorious weather, it seemed only right to take full advantage of these! The views over the Solent towards the Isle of Wight were stunning and as you can imagine, it was extremely peaceful and relaxing.
Before we went to the fort, we decided to book onto a rum tasting experience which was held in the rum bar in the lighthouse. It was actually a fun experience to do as we had another couple who were great fun. The rums weren't overly expensive or exotic rums, but it was nice to do something a little bit different and our host was great.
After a few shots of rum, it was time to get ready for dinner and head down to the mess hall. On the fort everyone eats at the same time on communal tables. Again, this was actually a really nice change to the norm. We had a great table of really chatty people however, we met a couple who had been on the fort the night before and said it was a completely different experience as the table was more 'mature' and serious.
On to the food. There is one menu for the whole fort unless you have any special dietary requirements. This was a bit of a surprise given that some of the rooms on the fort are over £1,000 per night, but I sat down with an open mind read to tackle a 3 course meal. Sometimes a reduce menu can be really tasty as it means the chef focuses all of their efforts into those set dishes...other times it can taste like cheap wedding food and on this occasion, unfortunately, it was the latter.
The food was beautifully presented but the taste was really bland and felt mass produced even though there were only around 40 people having dinner. The main was beef and I normally love beef and I don't think I have ever been known to leave beef, but I just couldn't eat this dish.
After a rather disappointing meal, we all headed up to the roof for hot chocolate around the fire. This was a really nice way to round of dinner and many of the guests were feeling much more relaxed after a communal dinner. Given how mild it still was at the time, a few of us took advantage of the hot tubs and decided to have a late night dip.
A few drinks later and the group slowly started to filter down to bed. We were staying in Room 12 which unfortunately for us is based right about the generator. On the website, it now clearly states that these rooms are affected by a 'hum' from the generator which I think is extremely misleading as you would think that a hum is generally not too loud. I am one of those people that can generally sleep anywhere and once I'm asleep, I'm gone to the world, so for the generator to keep me awake and then disturb my sleep shows that it really was loud. When I complained the next morning to the staff on site I was told they could so nothing and I needed to contact the fort manager. There were also a few other couples who commended that the noise was loud and too disturb their sleep.
Overall, I have a really mixed view of my stay at No Man's fort. As it was beautifully hot and sunny we were able to spend most of our stay outside on the roof, but I wonder if the weather hadn't been so kind to us, what we would have done? On the fort there isn't much to do inside other than drink, which for some people is fine, but if you don't plan of drinking your bodies weight in booze, then it might not be the best place for you. For some people I guess you can use this opportunity to read or catch up on sleep?
The only word I can use to describe the food while being reasonably polite is average. When you think what some of the top rate rooms are paying around £1,000 per night, you would expect more than just average food.
I think another thing to note was that they seemed very understaffed as well. While we were doing our rum tasting another guest come up to ask where all the other staff were and why so few of the bars were open. The short of it was, there weren't enough staff around to accommodate all of the guests.
I feel that if the weather had not been on our side and if we hadn't had such a nice group visiting at the same time, we would have been extremely disappointed. Although we had a nice time (due to those two factors) I can't say I would recommend No Man's fort. It feels like they are charging a high rate for an average experience. It also feels like they aren't really too sure what their target market is and until they establish this, it feels to me like No Man's Forts is literally in no man's land in terms of their positioning in the market.
To conclude, I would say approach with caution. Maybe look at doing an afternoon tea experience so you can see the fort and experience the tour to understand its history, then head elsewhere for dinner and a good nights sleep!
We parked at Gunwharf Quays as the boat leaves from the shopping outlet and made our way to the check in desk. After dropping off our bags, we had a little bit of time to do some shopping and grab a quick bite to eat before setting sail. Normally, the boat goes via Spitbank Fort but on this occasion it was being used for a private event so we wizzed past and headed to our fort. The journey took around 30 minutes and was really enjoyable given the calm waters and beautiful blue skies.
When you board the fort, you are welcomed with a glass of prosecco and then the guests are split into two parties, the day guests and overnight guests. From here you are taken on a tour of the fort and are told about its interesting history. This was actually really interesting and enjoyable. After the tour, the day guests headed off for their afternoon tea and the evening guests are able to check into their rooms and experience what the fort had to offer.
We were lucky enough to visit when the we were experiencing a real summer in the UK (which lets face it, doesn't happen often!) so it made sense to spend as much outside as possible. One of the great things about the fort is that it has two hot tubs locate on the roof. Given the glorious weather, it seemed only right to take full advantage of these! The views over the Solent towards the Isle of Wight were stunning and as you can imagine, it was extremely peaceful and relaxing.
Before we went to the fort, we decided to book onto a rum tasting experience which was held in the rum bar in the lighthouse. It was actually a fun experience to do as we had another couple who were great fun. The rums weren't overly expensive or exotic rums, but it was nice to do something a little bit different and our host was great.
After a few shots of rum, it was time to get ready for dinner and head down to the mess hall. On the fort everyone eats at the same time on communal tables. Again, this was actually a really nice change to the norm. We had a great table of really chatty people however, we met a couple who had been on the fort the night before and said it was a completely different experience as the table was more 'mature' and serious.
On to the food. There is one menu for the whole fort unless you have any special dietary requirements. This was a bit of a surprise given that some of the rooms on the fort are over £1,000 per night, but I sat down with an open mind read to tackle a 3 course meal. Sometimes a reduce menu can be really tasty as it means the chef focuses all of their efforts into those set dishes...other times it can taste like cheap wedding food and on this occasion, unfortunately, it was the latter.
Starter - Smoked Salmon, asparagus, pickled cucumber salad
Main - seared aged sirloin of British beef, horseradish mash, balsamic tomato, summer vegetables and a red wine jus
Dessert - summer pavlova, mixed berries, strawberry ice cream & Italian meringue
After a rather disappointing meal, we all headed up to the roof for hot chocolate around the fire. This was a really nice way to round of dinner and many of the guests were feeling much more relaxed after a communal dinner. Given how mild it still was at the time, a few of us took advantage of the hot tubs and decided to have a late night dip.
A few drinks later and the group slowly started to filter down to bed. We were staying in Room 12 which unfortunately for us is based right about the generator. On the website, it now clearly states that these rooms are affected by a 'hum' from the generator which I think is extremely misleading as you would think that a hum is generally not too loud. I am one of those people that can generally sleep anywhere and once I'm asleep, I'm gone to the world, so for the generator to keep me awake and then disturb my sleep shows that it really was loud. When I complained the next morning to the staff on site I was told they could so nothing and I needed to contact the fort manager. There were also a few other couples who commended that the noise was loud and too disturb their sleep.
Overall, I have a really mixed view of my stay at No Man's fort. As it was beautifully hot and sunny we were able to spend most of our stay outside on the roof, but I wonder if the weather hadn't been so kind to us, what we would have done? On the fort there isn't much to do inside other than drink, which for some people is fine, but if you don't plan of drinking your bodies weight in booze, then it might not be the best place for you. For some people I guess you can use this opportunity to read or catch up on sleep?
The only word I can use to describe the food while being reasonably polite is average. When you think what some of the top rate rooms are paying around £1,000 per night, you would expect more than just average food.
I think another thing to note was that they seemed very understaffed as well. While we were doing our rum tasting another guest come up to ask where all the other staff were and why so few of the bars were open. The short of it was, there weren't enough staff around to accommodate all of the guests.
I feel that if the weather had not been on our side and if we hadn't had such a nice group visiting at the same time, we would have been extremely disappointed. Although we had a nice time (due to those two factors) I can't say I would recommend No Man's fort. It feels like they are charging a high rate for an average experience. It also feels like they aren't really too sure what their target market is and until they establish this, it feels to me like No Man's Forts is literally in no man's land in terms of their positioning in the market.
To conclude, I would say approach with caution. Maybe look at doing an afternoon tea experience so you can see the fort and experience the tour to understand its history, then head elsewhere for dinner and a good nights sleep!
(All pictures taken & owned by SistersDineOut)
